What (Not) To Wear: Pregnancy Clothes

By Viv Schaffel

Shared by Kristin
Pregnancy is an awesome thing. Your body is growing a person and, well, nothing beats that, in terms of natural beauty. But as your bod shape-shifts into forms you never imagined possible, a mental readjustment to your reality is important. Aside from the baby itself, there are physical positives (you're up a cup size!) and negatives (I weigh HOW MUCH?!) all at once. The key is to go with the flow, let your figure do what it needs to do, and dress in a way that makes the most of your given situation.

When I was pregnant, I discovered quickly the Do’s and Don’ts of dressing my baby bump. Here’s a short list of the get-ups you won’t find me in while preggo.

Belly shirts. Pregnancy bellies are beautiful, but we don't need to gaze onto the actual orb to partake in its wonder. I try to be a gracious Lady Madonna ... not the singer by the same name. Even when the Queen of Pop herself was pregnant, she saw fit to put away her belly button. Those crop tops that read "Baby On Board" just didn’t flatter my belly or my humor. If I felt like showing off my "dangerous curves," I did so in a body hugging top or dress that a) didn't literally spell it out and b) kept all my business inside.

Short shorts. I found that wearing short shorts just wasn’t a comfortable option during my pregnancy. My waistband would shimmy down and my shorts would eventually ride up -- lots of adjusting! No one’s got time for that when she’s on the go.

Muumuus. I know I was tempted to take shelter in shapeless bed sheets during my last trimester. Ladies, avoid the muumuu like the plague. I know, your body craves freedom from any and all clothes, but this, my pregnant friends, is the equivalent of grubby sweatpants. It tells the world you've completely given up. Opt for a cheerful sundress with some definition in the bust, or an empire waist dress instead -- you’ll not only look better but also feel better!

Suspenders. Okay, I’m pretty sure this speaks for itself, but suspenders are probably one of the least flattering looks to put on a pregnant body. And I get it -- it’s hard to keep those pants up over that mom-to-be belly! But hey -- elastic waist pants are a gal’s best friend. Believe me on this on

Viv Schaffel is a freelance journalist and essayist who writes for a vast array of publications, including CBS Watch!, The New York Times, Working Mother and The New York Post. She writes/performs sketch comedy and is an upstanding member of US Weekly’s Fashion Police, poking fun at red carpet risks.
Our parenting advice is given as suggestions only. We recommend you also consult your healthcare provider, and urge you to contact them immediately if your question is urgent or about a medical condition.