Q:
I'm a daycare provider and take care of between two and four other children during the day.
My daughter, who is 20 months old, has suddenly become clingy and possessive. When I pick up any of the other children she starts to hit us. She also becomes upset when anyone hugs me, including her father.
She's become moody, throws temper tantrums and starts hitting other children. She yells so much that her face turns red and she can hardly breathe. I have tried time-outs; they don't seem to alter her behavior. Is this normal for a child this age? Is there something I can do to relieve her anxiety?
A:
I have seen similar situations arise when well-intentioned moms set up home daycare.
The problem is that their children can't tolerate sharing their mom with the other kids. It drives them wild and creates all sorts of anger. I know you mean well, but you can't expect your 20-month-old child to be mature enough to share you. If you continue to divide your time between her and your work, your daughter's behavior will become increasingly difficult and your relationship with her will be affected.
Kenneth N. Condrell Ph.D Child Psychologist
Our parenting advice is given as suggestions only. We recommend you also consult your healthcare provider, and urge you to contact them immediately if your question is urgent or about a medical condition.
