Q:
My 9-month-old daughter has a difficult time at daycare.
She's afraid of older babies, doesn't nap easily and seems upset throughout the day. The provider also says she doesn't play well with other babies. She's fine when I'm at daycare, and she's happy at home.
My daughter only goes to daycare 15 hours a week, but I'm concerned about how unhappy she seems. Should I seek other care? My husband and I both have to work and cannot afford to stay home.
A:
At 9 months of age babies don't get real pleasure or comfort from being around other babies. The primary person in the life of a 9-month-old is mom—and in families where dads are very involved, the primary people are mom and dad.
The daycare provider you're relying on doesn't seem to know much about babies. An experienced caretaker would not expect a child that young to play with other children.
I strongly suggest you find another arrangement for your daughter. Maybe you and your husband can change work schedules. Maybe your relatives can help out. Or perhaps there is a nurturing home daycare situation. Whatever the case, I hope you can arrange something that benefits you and your baby.
Kenneth N. Condrell Ph.D Child Psychologist
Our parenting advice is given as suggestions only. We recommend you also consult your healthcare provider, and urge you to contact them immediately if your question is urgent or about a medical condition.
