Q:
How do I convince my husband that just having one child might cause our son to feel alone, lonely and possibly spoiled? I come from a family of five children and always loved having siblings.
My husband had only one sister and they aren’t very close. Will having only one child put her at a serious disadvantage now and in the future? Is it OK to have an only child?
A:
The facts and data available do not support the myth that being an only child is a disadvantage. To the contrary, only children have many things going for them. They truly are special, and this doesn’t mean they will grow up spoiled and selfish.
I think you are on much more solid ground by approaching your husband with the real reason you want another child: because you want another child! Instead of trying to worry him about your child being lonely and spoiled, concentrate on how your family life will be enriched with one more. By all means assure your husband that the marriage will always be a priority. Men often feel after the birth of their first child that they have lost the special relationship with their wife.
It is possible that your dedication to your child has made your husband feel left out; perhaps he worries that the birth of another child will push him further into the background.
Kenneth N. Condrell Ph.D Child Psychologist
