One of the major tasks every parent faces during the early childhood years is the socialization of their child. This is when kids are introduced to manners, appropriate behaviour, getting along with others and knowing the difference between right and wrong. Therefore, I agree that your granddaughter should be dressed appropriately at the dinner table and while she plays. You have implied to your daughter that going shirtless is a sexual issue, and this may be why she is disagreeing with you.
However, I do not agree with the way you are approaching your daughter. When you say she must abide by your rules, you’re talking about her like she’s a child. Talk to her woman to woman about the house rules. If you take this approach you will have a much better chance of not alienating her.
Our parenting advice is given as suggestions only. We recommend you also consult your healthcare provider, and urge you to contact them immediately if your question is urgent or about a medical condition.