I’m going back to work because we need the money. My mother-in-law wants to live with us to watch our baby, but we’re not close. She smokes and doesn’t have a good vocabulary. Is a good idea? I'm not comfortable with the arrangement at all.
It’s nice for a baby to have a grandmother care for him in the comfort of his own home. This way he’s with one person he knows rather than exposed to multiple caregivers in a daycare setting. He also won’t be exposed to lots of children, so he won’t be coming home with one illness after the next.
I think you should focus on making the option work with your mother-in-law. Nicely remind her of the dangers of secondhand smoke. Tell her that it’s also called passive smoking, and it’s just like putting a cigarette in a child’s mouth. Persuade her to smoke outside the house, relying on a baby monitor or watching your child through a window while he’s in a playpen.
Also, have your mother–in-law watch you for several days as you care for your baby, so she learns your routine. I hope you can make this work.
Our parenting advice is given as suggestions only. We recommend you also consult your healthcare provider, and urge you to contact them immediately if your question is urgent or about a medical condition.